Friday Fund-Day

So this is much harder than I thought!

Anyone who has had to do fundraising before for a project or for their salary, knows of the kind of terrible feelings that well up inside at the thought of doing it. I now realize that I would rather fast from food for weeks than call someone about fundraising for my personal support. I don't know if I have ever hated something before this came into my life....and I am not even using a hint of sarcasm when I say this!

It is true that through fundraising, the darkest places in your life can come up, all your fears, doubts, prideful issues...all personal devils stand and loom before you with glaring clarity forcing to be battled against. Fundraising is my Goliath and so far I have acted like the frightened Israelites on the front lines, running away any time he appears, thinking they will be devoured and defeated.

I desire, however, to have a spirit like David, to be a warrior, brave, bold and courageous, a spirit to stand and face my enemy (Fundraising) and say "you come against me...but I come against you in the name of the LORD Almighty..." (1 Sam. 17:45). I know no other way to defeat this giant in my life except through the weapons of prayer and the Word of God, and it is proving to be a battle that is making progress and taking ground - with small steps and inch-by-inch.

Blessedly I have a team who believes in me and wants to encourage and challenge me specifically in this way. In vulnerablity and honesty, I come before my supervisor every week and share my struggles, ideas, confessions and hopes for fundraising and together we have created a plan and strategy to see me step forward and claim the victory. We are calling in Friday Fund-day, and every Friday is dedicated to personal fundraising and all that goes along with it.

I can almost guarantee that this will be a constant struggle and something that will stand before me personally, emotionally, mentally and spiritually, but is part of the journey that I want to give my life to as I desire wholeheartedly to follow after God and his calling. Fundraising is a spiritual discipline for me now, along with all the others, that is to be a part of my daily Christian walk.

Tomorrow is going to be my first Friday Fund-day!

Lent

So it is again the season of Lent. To fast and sacrifice for forty days, to surrender to voluntary weakness. It was not until a couple of years ago that I had even heard of Lent because the church tradition that I have grown up in never participated in it, or metioned it as an important part of the Church calendar. Through a friend in high school, I learned, briefly, about the concept and thought I would give it a try. Since then, lent has become a special time in my year that I intentionally turn to God and ask what I can do to draw nearer to him and prepare my heart for Easter.

Last year I wanted to practice the spiritual discipline of fasting for the first time in my life. So, every Wednesday I fasted from food, and though I experienced much temptation (especially because I was on tour and everywhere we went, people wanted to bless us with the ministry of hospitality and good food), it was a time that God placed a hunger in my heart for far more than food - but rather a hunger and thirst for His presence and for getting closer to my Heavenly Father. Last Lent season marked the beginning of a desire to live a lifestyle of fasting and prayer unto the glory and praise of God, and it has been an incredible journey that I want to continue on for the rest of my days.

I do not want Lent to simply be a forty-day period of committment, dedication and sacrifice to God, a static season of will-power, but rather a foundational and transformational moment in time that draws me closer to the things of God and effects who I am as a radical follower of Jesus Christ.

So, thinking about Lent this year, I went to the Lord and asked him about an area in my life that needs to be transformed and touched with his love. The issue of fundraising came up immediately. I am new to the minsitry of fundraising as part of serving God with the postion that he has given me as a full-time camp director, and very clearly, I see that there are a lot of things wrong with my conceptions, expectations and attitudes towards the work of fundraising. This has been a huge issue the last couple of weeks, and so I have decided to focus on the spiritual discipline of fundraising for the the next forty days and then see how that continues on for the rest of my life.

I pray about a lot of things, but never fundraising, so everyday for lent, an hour a morning is going to be spent on praying about fundraising and for God to speak to me about his heart on this subject. I will keep you posted!

Passion

This is from a compilation of notes that I have written in the past and I thought this was as good a place as any to start this new season of my life as a blogger.

So for those of you how have spent any length of time with me, you know that I think...a lot...and then all of a sudden a whole bunch of words get spit-up onto a page and I make you read it, or listen to me read it. Well, here is the latest musing that has made its way onto my computer. A well-know church and ministry leader once said that young people who want to be involved in ministry have only two things - passion and stupid stories..and that is what is what we desperately need! For experience always comes, but true passion and vision, especially when it is new and fresh, should be encouraged and given room to flourish.

This last year has been about learning what passion is. I have also known what I am good at, what my strengths and weaknesses are, understood that I would do a wonderful job at a certain profession, knew what I liked and disliked...but I was not sure about what I loved or what I really wanted to do. I did not understand passion. To be honest, I did not think that I was one of those people who had passion...... And then the revelation that everyone was created in passion, for passion, to be loved by a passionate God, who is passionate pursuing His Bride!

Passion is that which God puts in your heart to make you feel the most alive. It is the Love of the Father and of Jesus' desire for his Church. God wants every one of us to live out of passion, for he sent His Son so that "we might experience life, and life to the fullest!"To often, however, we accept what we can do, what seems logical and like the best thing in this status-oriented, materialistic, rational world instead of pursuing true life and the promise of its fullness. To live with passion is to go after the heart of God, to desire to come into alignment with his plan and will for your life, and to cast aside all that hinders you from attaining your purpose: to be loved by the Creator, to love God and further His Kindgom here on earth. I want to live out of passion even if it means all I have is stupid stories.

My sister teases me a lot about this six letter word. She says my slogan or mantra for life should be, "Be Passionate," and my whole family smirks at the number of times I wirte or talk about it. Over the last six months or so, this six letter word has begun to show up all the time and God seems to highlight it at every turn. From songs that I hear, books I read, sermons I listen to, when I am praying or simply in the conversations that I have with people throughout the day, "passion" is the word constantly buzzing in my ears and stirring in my spirit.

We are being called to live passionate lives for God and to stand with courage for his Name! This is a generation that is desperately searching for something that will give them life, something that they will feel passionate about, something to give their lives to - be it a human rights cause or saving the planet or AIDS awarness and prevention...but we are all searching for real life that fulfills and excites our hearts. The only place to find real joy, fulfillment and passion is in Jesus Christ, and this world desperately needs to see and witness people who are filled with true passion! So, my favourite word has become "Passion" and I pray that it remains so for a very long time!

My passion: 1) Loving and worshiping my Creator, Savior, Father, Helper and Friend 2) Seeing this generation live in the freedom of who God created them to be! I want to help lead, speak and mentor youth and young adults to experiencing the Love of the Father, the Grace of the Savior, the power of the Spirit, and the freedom of living Brave lives full of purpose and passion - impacting the world around them.

Here we go!