His Eyes

Revelation 19:12 "His eyes were like a flame of fire and on His head were many crowns. He had a name written that no one knew except Himself."

Song of Solomon 5:12 "His eyes are like doves by the rivers of water, washed with milk, and fitly set."

Until recently, the seeming obscurity of these verses would have warranted only a small glance as I passed over them onto something else more gripping. But now, there is nothing more captivating and revelatory than these verses to my heart. Thanks to my friend Rebecca, who lead our 8:30 set team at Sanctuary House of Prayer, and had us focus on these verses last week, these two passages jumped to life. They helped to give understanding and language to what God has been doing in my heart over the last 40 days or so.

During this season of fasting, I have been meditating on the First Commandment (Matt. 22:37) and feeling the tangible longing to be fully united with Christ - to love Him fully with all of my life and to experience His love and communion. I have woken up some mornings to tears and pain in my heart and soul because I so desperately want more of God and to know Him.

That is where these passages about Christ's eyes break in; they speak of His burning desire and passion, His kindness and longing for me! He was the One to love me with all of Himself, to the point of suffering and death on the cross for me to be reconciled with the Father. It is His all-consuming love that burns for me, and His longing for a Bride to be pure and spotless for the day of His Return..."Let us be glad and rejoice and give Him glory, for the marriage of the Lamb has come, and His bride has made herself ready" (Rev.19:7). The longing in my heart is only because the Spirit of God is inside of me, working out faith and love through wisdom and revelation in the knowledge of Jesus (see Eph.1:17).

And then the first and great commandment folds into that thought so seamlessly in my heart: Matt.22:37 is in the larger story of chapter that He begins with the parable of the wedding feast. He gives the great commandment in the context of the message of the kingdom being like a marriage relationship. Jesus is calling them to wholehearted love. It's like Jesus is saying, "It's about loving me with all of your heart, soul, mind and strength. Why? Because I love you with all of my heart, my soul, my strength." It's about being equally yoked in love forever!!

We are meant to love Jesus with the same intensity that He loves us! We are meant to be a Bride, pure and spotless, ready and waiting for His return, to be equally yoked to Him forever. Obviously, our capacities and ability to love are meager compared to the greatness of the Lord, who's very essence is love. He is the One whose eyes are like a flame of fire! He is the One who pursues us. It is He who will "Rejoice over you with gladness, He will quiet you with His love, He will rejoice over you with singing" (Zeph.3:17). As we gaze at Him, spend our life loving Him with all our heart, soul, mind and strength, we will be burned, purified, and refined in the fiery love of His gaze. He gazes at us; we gaze at Him; and we are not the same.

There is a power and intensity in Rev.19:12 that resonates in my spirit, and leaves an echo that increase the ache and longing for more of Him. And the gentleness, care, compassion and deep affection in Song of Solomon description of the dove's eyes, soothes my heart with reassurance and gratitude for this love.

I'm left lovesick and aching for more.

Some of these thoughts have been inspired by listening to the First Commandment series from IHOP. Here's a little taste:
Mike Bickle says, "Can you imagine the indescribable reality of the Genesis 1 God; the God who created....He loves me..and you..with all of His heart, with all of His mind, with all of His strength! This is indescribable good news!" (First Commandment Series: Session 08. End of the Age Ministry Paradigm).

Coffee from the Sky

This will make anyones day:

This weekend was beautiful out, so I took the chance to grab the camera and head out to my favourite locations in the Exchange. Cassia met me downtown, later to be joined by Rebecca and Shira. We had a fun afternoon of trying on vintage clothing, playing in a toy store for an hour, and basking in the Spring sunshine.

This however, just made the day even better:

Across the street from Vintage Glory, there was a little booth thing that had a sign saying “Please ring for free gift of coffee,” providing a cup dispenser and a little garbage can. If you waited, coffee would flow down from a fourth floor window to the end of a tube and into your cup. This little booth made peoples days!

Everyone was smiling and yelling, “Thank you free-coffee -people”… “Thank you coffee-from-the-sky!” What a great idea.

I didn't drink the coffee because I was a little wary of any beverage coming out of the end of a very long hose, especially from a mysterious location, but it still made me laugh and warm on the inside.

I'm Giving this another Go

It's been over a year since I've had anything to do with this blog. It was probably a really good thing for me, but all of a sudden, I had another urge to begin writing again, even if no one ever read it.

I'm not going to attempt to fill in the spaces of all that has happened in the last 13 months....impossible! I'm a very different person; I wouldn't even recognize myself this time last year. God has definitely shown Himself powerful, glorious and merciful! I'll leave it at that for now.

Here's a link to the latest sermon I preached at Elmwood MB Church, February 21 (go to the audio sermon tab).

Worthy!

Revelation 5:9-10

"You are worthy to take the scroll,
And to open its seals;
For You were slain,
And have redeemed us to God by Your blood
Out of every tribe and tongue and people and nation,
And have made us kings and priests to our God;
And we shall reign on the earth."

The big deal is that this is Jesus! This is Jesus, fully man, fully God, the only one worthy to take the title deed of the earth – to own and rule every piece of earth; everything. Not only is this the divine Jesus, but more staggeringly, this is Jesus the Man!

God gave man the earth to rule (Gen 1:28), and we handed that over to the devil (Gen 3:6-7). God’s sovereign plan is that the earth will always be ruled by man, and so it is Jesus as a man that will make that happen! He gave up being fully only God forever so that he would wear humanity forever and therefore redeem, save and govern the earth. His humanity is what this huge thing is about. His blood on the cross, as a man, is what is redeeming us to God. The blood of a man to wash us and drive away darkness.

So for a man to be worthy to take the scroll, that’s a big deal! The devil tried doing that when he tempted Jesus in the wilderness saying that he would give Him all the authority of the earth (Luke 4:6-8) but Jesus refused to be tempted to take that power from the devil because He is only to take that title deed from the hand of the Father. And He will do it in justice and righteousness, purity and humbleness.

It is Jesus as a man that is going to take the scroll and open its seals. This is important to remember as you read through the book of Revelation. It is not the devil who is releasing these judgments on the earth – it is Jesus and it is part of the Battle Plan to prepare the earth for the restoration of all things. It is by the man Jesus, and through the praying church, that these things will happen.

This is so important because singing and saying Rev. 5 helps us to come into alignment under the leadership of Jesus. To come under His leadership now is the hardest thing for our sinful nature to grasp. What so many believe about the End Times and how the church views it as, “Well, when Jesus comes back we will know and we will just do what He says and it will all work out because I love Jesus. I will be safe and watching from heaven as Jesus beats up the Anti-Christ. I don’t need to study it or really pay any attention to the book of Revelation, etc.” The problem with that is that it presumes we will easily agree with the leadership of Jesus and agree with what He is doing, and yet we right now fight the leadership of Jesus in our own lives.

Coming under the lordship and leadership of Jesus now will help us not to be offended in that day and to be prepared and to align ourselves with what He is doing. I want to be one who partners with God in His End Time plan; not fearful, confused or offended by what is happening around me, but to rather be a part of the praying and believing church that is saying "Come Lord Jesus" and releasing judgment on the earth.

To pray this and to proclaim that God is worthy is to set my heart in line with Jesus, to begin to see and have revelation of the man Jesus and to say "yes" to His leadership in my life. He is worthy of my pursuit of holiness, He is worthy of my devotion, diligence, praise, time, affection, money, etc. He is worthy to shake the earth – to shake everything that can be shaken (Haggai 2:6-8). He is worthy to take the title deed of the earth – to rule and reign over all. He is worthy of my "yes." Daily, a little bit by little bit, to have my yes become stronger and my pronouncement of “worthy” made with more conviction and faith.

Singing and praying this passage reminds me of where my heart is to be and shakes the things in my life so that only He remains. It is a prayer and invitation for Him to come and establish His leadership in my heart and to set my eyes on things above, casting aside worthless things, things that so easily entangle, and to run the race before me with endurance and perseverance.

Like Mike Bickle says, that we can spend more time in Rev 4 and 5 than perhaps anywhere else in the Bible because of the Beauty Realm of God and its unending power to fascinate, transform, reveal, and shake us into closer, more intimate and true relationship with the God and king of the earth… “you will never exhaust what the holy spirit will reveal to you in Rev 4 and 5.”

And, it is an invitation for us to participate in it. We are not just idly sitting by as we pray this or as the events of the End Times unfold, but with incredible grace and love beyond our comprehension, Jesus makes us to rule and reign with Him. To be part of the leadership of the earth in the age to come, to participate and help release the activities to prepare the earth for His return and to forever stand in His presence offering praise and glory, adulation, honor, and songs unto the Lamb who is worthy. We will be able to join in the songs of Rev 4 and 5, we will fall at the feet like the 24 elders and the seraphim and continue to sing new songs to our God forever. I want to begin now.

(This is from part of the notes I used to speak from at the Tuesday Evening Prayer Meeting, Sanctuary House of Prayer, February 10).

Acclimatization

Acclimatization:
Becoming accustomed to a new climate or to new conditions.
Responding physiologically or behaviorally to a change in a single environmental factor.
This is my life.

From camp to city, from Winnipeg to Kansas City, from IHOP to Christmas, from family to moving out, from time away to intense schedules, from solitude to social calendars, meetings, deadlines, activities, and catching up. Six months feels more like a year or two. Transition is the norm. Constantly adjusting, changing, moving, shifting, altering. It is the state of my life. The place of my soul.

A box of books and a suitcase are a beautiful picture of freedom and adventure to me and I am more than content to be able to carry my life. I feel kind of like turtle. My home is with me wherever I go. For wherever I find myself at this moment, if feels like home as it is the place where I am seeking God and learning to pursue Him with all my heart, soul, mind and strength. "For where your treasure is, there will your heart be also" (Mt. 6:21). Obviously, I'm not totally there yet, but that's the goal and aim - to abide in Christ. To be at home in Jesus.

Every time I am somewhere new or come back from something, there is a season of transition and becoming accustomed to the conditions around me again. Since returning from IHOP to be with the family for Christmas and then moving out into a house on Langside Ave, I was bracing myself for the difficult and stressful transition. Surprisingly, it did not happen! Miraculously, and by the sovereign grace of God, it was smooth and enjoyable! I have been known to have rocky and emotional transitions, even if just going from camp to the city for a week, but this time it was quite the opposite. I felt renewed vision and excitement about being in Winnipeg and to once again engage in the work and friendships in the city, fellowshiping with my family and Christian communities. I was excited to pray and intercede for my city, friends, family, work and country.

With this unbelievable gift of quick and pleasant adjustment also came a peace in my spirit about not worrying about my future. Whatever I might try to plan or imagine I know would suck in the face of what God's mighty and sovereign plan for my life looks like. I don't want to stand in the way, but instead to be fully ready, willing and trusting to simply say "yes" and step out into whatever it is. My plan is to depend on God, to wait on Him for direction, and become more deeply rooted in Him, so that no matter what comes my way, I will be able to stand unshakable and unmovable in the knowledge of who He is and who I am in Him. So, I have a general idea of what my life might be like until the end of September, and then.....?

This blog post has been sitting in my postings section unfinished for over a month now, and I find it more true then even when I first began typing it. The only difference is that I feel an increased urgency to live a life worthy of His calling (Eph 4:1) and to "throw off everything that hinders and the sin that so easily entangles, and let us run with perseverance the race marked out for us" (Heb.12:1)...to go to the place of prayer and sit in the presence of the Father so that the light of His countenance would burn away all that hinders love, to be transformed and made more into His likeness, and to daily acclimatize to the moving of the Spirit, and the beauty of Jesus Christ. I want know God more. I want to be Christ-like.

Mullets for Jesus

There has not been much activity to comment on in my life the last couple of weeks, but it has been wonderful none the less.

We had a snow storm last week that lasted for a couple of hours, resulting in hundreds of vehicles in accidents and in the ditch and a 'Snow Day' for kids in school the next day (which seemed ridiculous to me since it was only -4 and an inch of snow). Everything melted within a day and returned to the +10.C weather once again. Returning to Winnipeg is becoming a more and more difficult concept to grasp as they face the daily -35 + windchill reality.

The woman that I am staying with (Gerry) had major surgery about a week ago and has been recovering at home. I have loved the opportunity to serve her and help take care of the things around the house. It has been such a blessing to be around her, in her home and to meet all of her wonderfully loving and generous friends. I have been able to learn so much simply by being around these incredible men and women and Gerry's recovery is going miraculously. Praise the Lord! It will be very sad to leave in just over a week, but visit are already being planned.

My prayer room time this week has been an on-an-off experience. I am having more and more difficulty staying alert and awake, so I am trying to get more sleep so that I can be fully engaged before the Lord. Talking with a friend on the phone this week, I tried to explain what it has been like and I was only able to offer a giggle and a "It's great!" I continue to be encountered by the Lord and receiving revelation in the Word like never before. My favourite thing to do now is to simply read Scripture! I have worked through most of the New Testament and read the Book of Revelation almost four times. I can't go through Isaiah enough times, and and I am daily reading the psalms as well. I praise God for this season of being in a Greenhouse, where I have the opportunity to simply sit in the fertile environment and grow as much as possible.

It is not always huge things that I am learning, but some of the most powerful times are when the Lord reveals tiny little things in my heart and speaks His truth over me. For example:

I was just in the prayer room and saw THE WORLDS BEST MULLET!!!!! Nothing so awesome has ever been seen by my eyes before. It super buzz-cut in the front, long (like to her waist!) in the back...plus, half-grown out bleached highlights!!!! I am not making fun at all. It seriously was so incredible, I just couldn't help staring at her. And, I had a major revelation!....
Jesus loves her so much! He loves the mullet, He loves her style, He loves that she just wants to stand before Him and worship. He thinks she is beautiful and would not change a thing about her.
This may not seem like a big deal, but in general, if I mean to or not, I judge people. In little ways, I make assessments of who they are based on how they look. God totally just used that mullet to show me how wrong it is to judge people. He has created all of us in His image and delights in our individual quirks. How beautiful it is that every kind of person, every walk of life and every hairstyle can come to Jesus and be loved unconditionally by Him, and are equal before His throne!
Never has a mullet been so beautiful!

You shall love the Lord your God with all your heart, with all your soul, and with all your mind. This is the first and great commandment. And the second is like it: You shall love your neighbor as yourself. On these two commandments hang all the Law and the Prophets.

It will not be long before I am home once again. What will this final week hold?

American Thanksgiving Retreat Picture Album

American Thanksgiving and Retreat